Here's to the Ladies who Lunch... and Slay

I first became aware of Grady Hendrix a number of years ago, when he gave his Paperbacks from Hell presentation at a Writer's Retreat I attended, and the man was funny. Downright hysterical. I don't remember the last time I laughed so hard. So naturally, I assumed his books would be just as funny. So on my next trip to the bookstore, I grabbed a copy if Horrorstor... And hated it. The book just wasn't funny. No, wait... I take that back. There were maybe two funny lines in the entire book, and they occurred very early on in the book. Like maybe Chapter 1. Possibly Chapter 2. The rest was a slog with a bunch of very unlikable characters. I wanted to give the author another chance, though. I mean, everyone is entitled to have an off day (off book), so it was with some reluctance that I picked up The Southern Book Club's Guide to Slaying Vampires. It was described as Steel Magnolias meets Dracula,and I like both of those, and while it didn't WOW! me, it did end up enjoying it more than my previous exursion into Hendrix Country.

The premise is nothing new: handsome stranger (James Harris), who is not who or what he claims to be, worms his way into the lives of a close-knit community, while on the outskirts of town, children are either disppearing or committing suicide. The events happen to coincide with each other, but is he responsible? Patricia Campbell eventually stumbles onto the man's secret and takes it to her book club, and it's up to them to put an end to his reign of terror. But it's not as simple as it sounds because Patricia can't come right out and say the man is a vampire. Who would believe here? They don't even want to believe her when she accuses the man of being a child molester and a drug pusher who's selling drugs to children. It takes her three years to finally gather enough evidence, but even then they're reluctant to believe her because Mr. Harris has so firmly ingrained within their circle as an upstanding citizen, best friend and business partner to their husbands, and becomes idolized by their children. And as long as he doesn't hurt those within the community, that he continues to target the "poor" part of town, they're content to look the other way. But Patricia won't let it rest, and it's only when he attacks one of the book club members and sets his sights on Patricia's children that they decide something needs to be done.

While the book isn't as funny as I wanted it to be after seeing Hendrix's presentation, it does have its moments that had me chuckling, and it was 100x better than Horrorstor. There's a large cast of characters you need to keep track of, not all of which are likeable, but if feel like Hendrix drew a line on the floor and told all the good characters need to be on one side, and the bad characters on the other, and after everyone had chosen their sides, it's pretty much guys vs girls, which pretty much reflects the southern society of the time. I did find the pacing to be inconsistent. The book starts of strong, but about halfway through, it flatlines, at least for me (at this point I almost put the book aside), and doesn't pick up again until you're about three-quarters of the way through, at which point it moves like an express train toward the climax. Would I recommend it? If you only read "serious" horror, I don't think this is the book for you, but if you don't mind your horror on the light side with a smattering of humor, it's definitely worth checking out. 4/5 stars

But now I need a tie breaker. Which Hendrix book should I read next? Hmmmm... 

Hollywood Kills

 Some of my more recent reads have been about serial killers stalking film and TV sets and killing off cast, crew, and extras, so I knew it was only a matter of time before I stumbled across another one, and stumble I did with Chuck Tingle's Bury Your Gays. In all honesty, I was quite sure what to expect with this. Thanks to Amazon's screwed-up algorithm, I've seen some of his books online when browsing the horror selections, and a good portion of them are gay erotica with very outrageous titles. And I do vaguely remember some brouhaha a few years ago when he was nominated for some science fiction/fantasy award. So to say I wasn't expecting much would be an understatement. Boy, was I surprised.

The book tells the story of Misha Byrne, a relatively well-known screenwriter with some movies under his belt, a popular streaming series, and a short film that's earned him an Oscar nomination. In short, his star is finally rising -- until he is called in to meet with one of the studio executives, who proceeds to shatter his dreams by telling him the higher-ups want him to kill off two of his characters, who happen to be lesbians. The old trope that says gays and lesbians can never have a happy ending, that as soon as something good happens to them, tragedy MUST strike. Of course, Misha refuses, as this was something he's been building to ever since the series started. He's not going to bring them together, only to kill them off. There are the thinly veiled threats, but Misha plans to stick to his guns. Instead of being thrilled about his Oscar nomination and the upcoming award ceremony, he's stewing in a cloud of anger and fear, angry that if he doesn't do what the studio is telling him to do, he'll "never work in this town again." And if that isn't enough, he suddenly finds himself being stalked by crazed fans dressed as some of his horror creations. But are they simply crazed fans, or is the studio behind it, trying to scare him into doing what they want? Or is it something else? 

I really liked this one. It was well-written, populated with a cast of likable characters, and had the perfect balance of humor and horror (and I'm usually not a fan of horror comedy because it's so hard to do well). It moved along at a brisk pace, and took some turns I totally wasn't expecting. I mean, I thought I had it all figured out, but Tingle totally surprised me. Is it a little over the top? Of course, it is, but isn't all horror to some extent? If you're a fan of horror comedy, this one is definitely worth checking out. My only complaint? I personally would have liked to have seen a high body count and a little more gore. 4.5/5

Return to Hill House

Shirley Jackson's The Haunting of Hill House is a classic of the horror genre, as is its 1963 film adaptation, and is considered a Must Read/See for any horror enthusiast. So when I heard that there was an authorized sequel, Elizabeth Hand's A Haunting on the Hill, I knew it was one I was going to have to check out. And what better time to do it than at the start of what folks call the Spooky Season, when many avid readers, especially ones who don't normally read horror fiction, set out to find the creepiest, most horrifying reads to devour leading up to the best holiday of all -- Halloween.

Shirley Jackson has already set the stage for Elizabeth Hand's novel: a creepy old mansion with a dark history located on the outskirts of Hillsdale, geographic location not specified, although it's assumed the town is somewhere in the New England area. Don't know why, but I always assumed it was upstate New York.

In Hand's novel, we find a small group of theater people renting out Hill House for two weeks to workshop a a dark, supernatural play, much the the dismay of the "groundskeeper," Evadne Morris, and her niece, Melissa Libby, both of whom know the house's dark history. They try warning away Holly and her group, dropping menacing hints about the bad shit that's gone down in the past, but never once coming right out and saying what exactly those things were. Even Ainsley Rowan, the realtor (and owner) for Hill House, who also has knowledge of the house's history, doesn't try too hard to dissuade the playwright from renting the house. Not even the rental contract, full of enough clauses and disclaimers freeing her from... well, from anything that might befall the party, is enough to keep Holly from going ahead with the rental. It's almost as if something is preventing them from saying too much.

From the moment they set foot in Hill House, things begin to happen, subtle at first, that the group excuses away, each for their own reasons. And therein lies the problen with Hand's novel. Don't get me wrong... I enjoyed the book immensely, but there was something lacking, and that was the subtle escalation of events that build to the climax. Also missing is the strong psychological twisting and mental decline that Jackson did so masterfully that had the reader wondering: Is Nell a little unhinged (she was) or was it the house (it was)? Hand fails to deliver to us a fragile Nell-like character for the house to play with, and as a result, while we read on to find out what happens, we never become fully invested in any of the characters, not to the point we were with Jackson's Nell, and while we want to know what happens to them, we never truly fear for them.

The other thing I found mildly disappointing was the lack of reference to Jackson's original work. Here you have an authorized sequel, but never once are there specific references to the events that transpired all those years ago. They're alluded to, like the car and the stump, but there's nothing specific. Not even Stevie, when he recounts what he's learned from Googling Hill House, mentions Markway, Nell, or any of the events at that time. He mentions more recent transient residents of the house, but nothing about those events nor of the history of the house itself and the tragedy of the original family.

Those things aside, it shouldn't prevent you from enjoying Hand's novel for what it is -- a mildly creepy haunted house story. I would suggest listening to the audiobook on this one (I did), as the sound effects and hearing the old folk songs sung create a sense of atmosphere that brings out the spookiness of the narrative. More than once I found myself looking around for the source of sounds before realizing they were coming from the book itself, which was just a tad bit unsettling, making it the ideal book to start off the Spooky Season with. 4.5/5 stars  

I'll Get You, My Pretty...

 When I first happened across this, I knew it was going to be a Must Read. There are nearly enough books about witches. My only problem is, based soley on the cover (Never judge a book by its cover), I thought it was going to be a whimsical fairytale type story. Boy, was I ever wrong. Brom's Slewfoot: a tale of bewitchery is brutal, and I mean that in a good way.

Slewfoot offers a view of puritanical New England, a place where women had no rights and were treated only slightly better than the servants, where a slip of hair from the bonnet, or showing too much wrist or ankle or, God forbid, cleavage could earn you a night in the stocks, and possibly a turn at the whipping post. Any sign of what is considered disrepect toward the men folk can land you a jail stay. Or worse, as Abitha Williams is soon to find out.

Abitha is an England transplant, sold into marriage by her father. Her mother was a conjure woman, a woman versed in medicinal remedies and charms or blessings. Abitha, it seems, has inherited some of her mother's talent, but she needs to be very discreet, as knowledge and dabbling of this type could lead to an accusation of witchcraft. Edward, Elizabeth's husband, is a simple-minded man, maybe even "special,"; he's aware of her "talents," is unhappy that she dabbles but has not expressly forbid her from using her gift. When he does put his foot down, ordering her to do something, it's not done out of disrespect, but fear, fear for her safety, and fear for himself, because he knows he won't be abe to survive without her.

When the book opens, we're made aware of a presence on the Williams' acreage, and we know whatever it is craves blood, as Abitha's goat is one of the first victims. Jump to a confrontation between Edward and his brother, Wallace, who has put up Edward's farm as collateral against a venture that failed, and now the debt has to be paid. It seems that the farm is family land, and when the head of the Williams family passed, he left everything to Wallace. Edward is in the process of paying off the land, indeed, he only has one more payment to go, but under the knew ownership, it would mean he basically becomes a slave to the new owner. Abitha, never knowing when to keep her mouth shut, puts in her two cents (and rather forcefully, I might add), thus setting up the story-long conflict between Abitha and Wallace, which only escalates after Edward falls victim to whatever entity stalks the land, his body never to be found.

The beginning of Slewfoot starts off slow as relationships are established and the author paints a desolate picture of what life is like for women at this moment in history. After Edward's death, the story picks up as Abitha struggle to make the farm work while Wallace is doing everything within his power to see to it that she fails. Abitha gains certain allies along the way who make her question her faith, who slowly make Abitha aware that she possesses power and abilities she never knew she had. And through the struggles and hardships and trying to foil Wallace's attempts to claim her land, Abitha becomes a strong, independent woman, someone to be reckoned with, which is why Wallace has to resort to accusations of witchcraft to bring this woman to her knees. Or does he? And that's where the story really takes off. The tension rises during the course of the story and you can't help but keep turning the pages to the explosive climax.

With Slewfoot, the author has created a gripping narrative of power, privilege, and entitlement; of growth and self-discovery; of deceit and betrayal. It can also be looked at as a coming-of-age tale as Abitha comes into her own. It is a story that is at times heart-felt and at other times heart-breaking. A MUST READ. 5/5 stars

Wait for the Movie

Paul Tremblay is a name that's been on my radar, but I've never heard enough excitement surrounding his work to move him toward the top of my list. That is, until Horror Movie. And it's not so much that I've heard a lot of positive reviews but that fact that some of my recent reads have centered around horror movie sets and actors, extras, and crew being the targets of crazed killers, so I figured I'd add another to the list.

Horror Movie is two stories in one, each taking place years apart. The first one take place in June of 1993, when "a group of young guerilla filmmakers spent four weeks making Horror Movie, a notorious, disturbing, art-house horror flick," which feels more like a bunch of bored high school kids deciding they wanted to make a low-budget horror movie, a movie that ended in tragedy.

Jump to present day and the actor who played "The Thin Kid," who is the only survivor of the original group, is acting as a consultant for another group of film makers who are determined to finish what these kids started years ago. As a result, there are a lot of meetings taking place where not a lot happens. It's just a lot of talking, production talks, planning talks, actors reading through the script. During these talks, the book drags on and on and on. The only time the book gets remotely exciting is when the kids are filming and the "Big Reveal" at the end. The problem is, the reveal is lackluster and hardly worth the journey that we just trudged through.

I made the mistake of listening to this on audiobook, and there are some things that are probably intentionally added to the recording for "realism," but to me they came across as irritating glitches, the worst of which was the rattling of pages during the script readings that were annoying enough to break me out of the narration. Also, there was what I felt needless repetition during scene transitions which also sometimes came across as errors in the recording process. I wonder if my reception of the book would have been better if I had read the book as opposed to listening to it.

All in all, Horror Movie was a bore, and as this was my firstTremblay book, I wonder what his others will be like. Recommended? Nah, I'd wait for the movie. 2/5 stars. 

What Evil Lurks in the Hearts of Men

 

I first stumbled across Thomas Olde Heuvelt last year when I read Echo, which totally blew me away, so much so that I immediately added Hex to my ever-growing TBR pile but put off reading it until this year. You know the way of these TBR piles. But when I heard Oracle was a continuation of Robert Grim's story (or maybe a prequel), Hex moved up higher on my TBR. And if I thought Echo was an amazing read, Hex surpassed that.

Black Spring is an idyllic little town nestled in the Hudson Valley of New York State. On the outside, it appears life in this town is perfect, like you imagine small-town life would be. Think Mayberry, if you remember The Andy Griffith Show. They even have their own resident celebrity -- Katherine van Wyler, a centuries old witch who wanders the streets and drops in unexpectedly on families and often overstays her welcome.

You would think having a resident witch would be awesome, that they town would have a thriving tourist industry, that they would do everything they could to exploit the woman's presence since Katherine comes across as a curiosity more than anything else. She sticks to her routine, and for the most part, you could set your watch by the times she makes certain appearances about town and never appears to be outwardly threatening. But the woman and the town have a history, and history shows the witch could be unpredictable. As a result, they have certain rules and regulations that are religiously adhered to, and violations of these laws often result in archaic forms of punishment. They have a system in place that monitors the witch's appearance, and God forbid she should appear in public and hang around, they have measures in place to make certain outsiders do not become aware of her presence. They also attempt to keep out the outsiders, and those who ignore the warnings and decide to make Black Spring their home... Well, they've more or less signed their lives away, and the lives of their children, and their childrens' children, becauste, you see, what goes on in Black Spring stays in Black Spring. It's like a roach motel: you can visit, and all is well, but live in Black Spring and you can never leave. Any attempt to do so can result in insanity, and even death.

But as with any strictly regimented communities, there are those who seek to rebel. Aside from the few adults who resent their current living conditions, you have the teens, and in this particular case, a handful of teens who, in an age of social media, resent having their freedoms monitored or restricted and have established an underground society/club that is gathering evidence with the planes of going public with their dirty little secret. They think that by doing so, they will break the Black Spring curse and regain not just their freedom but those of the townsfolk as well. But there are those in town who are content to let sleeping dogs lie and will go to any extreme to make sure the town keeps it secrets.

I know some of the reviews for Hex have been negative, citing that the book is not scary. The book, however, is terrifying in that we are witness the extent to which superstition can govern a community, and any attempt at change can start the gradual unraveling of a civilized society until they are reduced to a primal mob mentality resistant to any form of logic or reasoning. It's made all the more horrifying by what is revealed at the book's conclusion.

Overall, I think Hex is small-town horror at its best. Heuvelt paints a chilling picture of what superstition and living in a constant state of fear can drive men to do, and how the tension of living with that constant fear can build until it finally explodes and how quickly civilized society can devolve to primitive levels. Highly recommended. 5/5 stars

It's a Mad House

Ever since I was a kid, I've loved Planet of the Apes. I've watched the movies numerous times, watched the TV series, the Saturday morning cartoon, and even loved the reboots, but I had never read the book the popular franchise was based on. Until now.

I wasn't sure what to expect, since the movie adaptations are NEVER faithful to the books, and was surprised to find that the differences take the book to the opposite end of the spectrum. The premises are the same, but the book is less brutal in some respects.

The premise is the same: astronauts land on a planet governed by apes and man is the beast. Where they diverge is in the beginning, which has two astronauts finding what amounts to a message in a bottle. Upon opening it, we get the account of Ulyssse Merou, a journalist who voyages into space with two others and a chimpanzee. Upon reaching their destination, they take a launch to the planet's surface (they don't crash), which is where they first encounter the feral breed of humans. The hunt is the same, but where they diverge is once Ulysse (Taylor in the movie) is captured. While the relationship with Zira and Cornelius is similar to that of the film, Ulysse eventually earns the apes' trust and wins his freedom and is able to walk freely among the apes. As a result, as you read, you'll recognize scenes from the movie, but they come with a twist or are slightly modified. And there's an even bigger surprise at the end (and no, he's not on a future version of Earth), which is how they originally wanted the movie to end, but they decided not to go in that direction. That particular twist is used in a later film. It would have been interesting to see what direction the films would have gone it had they gone with the original ending.

All in all, the book was a pleasant departure from the film I remember but had enough similarities as to stir up memories of my childhood. Even if you're familiar with the films, the book is definitely worth reading. For me, 5/5 stars.